Who Owns The Problem, Part 2

Once we recognize a problem is not ours to own, this doesn’t mean the actual owner of the problem will claim it. We can easily slip into manipulation trying to make others accept their problem.

When they don’t, we can be real jerks. From our perspective, the solution is very clear: Stop being stupid and doing stupid stuff!  “That’s your problem, not mine! Don’t call me when you get in trouble! I won’t even feel bad for you when you do.” 

Reality: If it was so easy to change, they would have already done it. People don’t enjoy being miserable, but they do become addicted to the patterns of behavior that keep them feeling misery….just like we get addicted to our patterns of trying to get others to do what we want them to do.

Crap! I hate when my own junk comes up in the midst of trying to point out the junk in someone else!

Letting someone own the problem is much different from trying to convince them to own it. When you try to convince them, you’re still owning it. Let go…again…and again. Repeat as needed.